You know that feeling you get when you see your cat looking at something and you can’t see crap? Utterly terrifying, IS IT A GHOST OR A FREAKIN PIECE OF LINT?!
So I have been gone A LONG TIME, if anyone had noticed, my posts were almost obsolete. Drawings? Forget it.
I had a huge decline in my health around June, my c.diff infection returned and the Remicade treatments made it worse/didn’t work for me at all. I’ve had two hospital stays since then and it has been really hard to get back to my normal self.
I’m pretty much bald again but fuck growing my hair out anymore I am looking into buying some nice wigs so if anyone has any suggestions on where I could buy that would be great. Moon face check, weight gain check, depression anxiety mode check.
Right now I’m trying some samples of Uceris just to pass the time until my next appointment, I couldn’t afford Humira but I found a program that might help me pay for it so we’ll see.
Overall my doctor isn’t even sure any of it will work, this disease just really sucks. Surgery has now become an option…all I need to do is say yes I suppose. I don’t even know what to think about it but there are times where I have felt so miserable I’d do it in an instant if it meant never feeling like that again.
Have you ever felt so horrible where you don’t even feel like the things going on around you are real? That’s how my life has felt for the past few months.
Well thank goodness for opiates lol the only thing that has kept me above water. Don’t worry I’m slowly getting off of them.
I’ve been thinking of doing something to get my mind off things (besides drawing I will be doing a lot of that). Like maybe a youtube channel but I dunno what my main focus would be…vlogs…video games?? or like me trying out new stuff perhaps it seems fun I’m just so derpy in front of a camera. I’m DERPY IN ANY SITUATION REALLY @_@